Monday, 19 March 2012

Mother's Day

BRIAN. Turn that daft game off now please. It's dinner time.
ED. I can't, if I pause it now Joe will invade my village and kill all my villagers... 
BRIAN. I don't care. Put some music on.
ED. ..and my dog.
BRIAN. Oh, I see, well, don't rush then. Just finish as quickly as you can.
ED. Right, I'm finishing....... now.
BRIAN. Fine. Let's put some music on then... No not that racket. Let Mummy choose.
ME. They were playing Rod Stewart in Rockit today. It sounded really nice. I wish I still had all my LPs and a record player. All my David Bowie records, all those CDs we had. You knew where you were with a CD. I hate iPods and iTunes. I don't know how to download the music, how to get it on the iPod or how to switch the iPod on...
BRIAN. Awww, shall I give you a tutorial darling.
ME. No 
BRIAN. Well, we've got the Rod Stewart album on iTunes.
ED. I'll put it on.
BRIAN. No, no. You eat your dinner. I'll do it... What the hell IS all this stuff on here? Who on Earth is XZIBIT? What the ****'s Trip To Trumpton Mash Up Mix? I wish the kids would keep their hands off my computer. I think we need to regain control of the technology in this house. I can't find it - not with all this rubbish on here. They don't even listen to half of it, I think they just put it on there to annoy me. Where the **** is it? R, R, R, R. Hang on I'll type it in. What?? no matches for Rod Stewart. For God's sake. How can there be no matches for Rod Stewart?
ED. You've typed Rod Stewbert.

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